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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Trees of the Field.

The trees gaze down on the two figures. One is perched on a blue bicycle. He clutches the handlebars like a prayer, a small wrinkle creasing his forehead. The larger figure crouches beside him, whispering, hoping. 

Their heads part, and the dance begins. She grips the seat and begins to run. His wheels spin, as she sprints, gripping his sweatshirt. "Don't let go! Don't let go!" he yelps. All is motion, as her shoes thwack the asphalt. Her heart pounds. His face melts into motion.

She lets go. He glides, an unwavering, elegant line. She runs behind him, raising her hands to the heavens. Don't let go, she whispers. Don't let go.

The oaks and willows observe his journey, whispering encouragement through age-old groans and whispers. He streaks down the road, all red hoodie and  propelled bravado. When ready, he glides to a stop.

She gasps, finds her footing. The world, once more, has shifted. "Mom," he says, "You've got yourself a bike rider!"

And the trees of the field clap their hands.



28 comments:

Bekah said...

"propelled bravado" -- love

earlybird said...

I liked this 'He clutches the handlebars like a prayer'

Ms. Moon said...

Wow. And right before I read your post, I read this one:
http://bigringcircus.blogspot.com/2011/09/risk.html

Strangely and beautifully synchronistic.

Renee said...

This is wonderful. You had me running beside you, holding on. My heart raced with the bike, and my hands were wringing with "Mom". You got it!

angela said...

I love the parallel hopes of "don't let go."

The audience of trees is perfect for this and so beautifully described.

logyexpress.com said...

What a great capture, I was right there with you. "Don't let go..." but you have to let go. My Dad literally couldn't let go, so my older brother had to teach me to ride my bike. It's an intricate dance, as you wrote! Lovely.

Kir said...

All is motion, as her shoes thwack the asphalt. Her heart pounds. His face melts into motion.

one of the things I have loved reading this week. It was wonderful and poignant and true. *weepy*

Elaine A. said...

Beautiful and brilliant and brilliant and beautiful.

Did I say beautiful and brilliant? Oh I did?

;)

seriously... I want more of your wrtiing all the time.

nicole said...

Hooray! I could see it all from your words. Perfect.

erin margolin said...

le sigh.

i love the personification of the trees. i have done that before. i love trees. so this was really easy for me to imagine.

another fucking incredible post.

xoxo

Anita said...

I like that! Took me back to teaching my kids to ride. What a task that was.

Like the others who have commented, I love visualizing the trees "gazing down" to watch; especially because I have so many tall and beautiful trees in my neighborhood.

Galit Breen said...

YAY for a bike rider! I loved how everyone- from parent to nature- cheered him on. Isn't that so the way it should be? Lovely friend!

Cheryl said...

Such a great moment, captured perfectly by you. It's one of those parenting moments that never gets old - I'm looking forward to #3 getting his wheels.

Love the images of the trees woven throughout, especially the last line.

julie moore said...

Brings back memories. Sweet long gone memories.

CDG said...

'"Mom," he says, "You've got yourself a bike rider!"'

Tears in my eyes. So awesome.

Victoria KP said...

This was marvelous. You really hit the assignment dead-on. I was out of breath from running along side you.

Kim said...

You may get two comments from me the first one disappeared. This is a wonderful piece, not surprisingly. You've captured this moment with such beauty and emotion. I too love the trees as the silent audience.

Julie said...

Can you hear my applause?
All the way from here.

I'm laughing and clapping and jumping up and down. At least my heart is.

For you. For him.
Your bike rider.

From Tracie said...

BEAUTIFUL!

Absolutely beautiful.

I love the way the trees were a character in your story, as they watched this special moment unfold.

tulpen said...

Also loving the 'propelled bravado'.

I need some trees to help my kid get over his fear of the bicycle.

Jen Has A Pen said...

I love such a simple and unforgettable moment like this. I was holding my breath. :-) I loved the clapping trees. I've never thought of them as an audience before.

Erin said...

Oh Nancy, just amazing! You put a tear in my eye, you brought me right back to when I learned to ride my bike and you have me looking forward to teaching my boys exactly the same way!

Not Just Another Mother Blogger! said...

"And the trees of the field clap their hands."


That line was so evocative, even after all the excitement of the bike ride!

Joanna Jenkins said...

Wow, Nancy. That was wonderful... " all red hoodie and propelled bravado". Great visual.
xo jj

Sara said...

Great sensory writing. You had me from the beginning to the end of this story. I could see the bike, the boy. I could feel the tension and the thrill of the bike moving. I loved the "thwack" as her shoes hit the asphalt.

In short, this was great writing and made me step inside this special moment. Thanks!!!

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

Aw, I love the ending comment - so proud and satisfied!

Jenny said...

Man. Your writing is getting so tight! Awesome.

Ash said...

Like your above post wasn't making me cry enough.

"The world, once more, has shifted." - perfection