A True Yogi

I did an internet thingy awhile ago where I asked friends and acquaintances to explain what would cause me to be in the back of a police car. The results included:

*Civil disobedience
*Knocking somebody out to get a book at the library (OK, this is a little close to the truth)
*Knifing a creepy man who looked at my boys wrong.
*Dealing heroin (This must have been a friend from college...)
*Reckless driving due to attempts to keep Joel awake while simultaneously drinking a latte. (Again, close to the truth).

I've got creative friends. Go, creative friends!

However, I must inform you all that there is a new crime to add to the list. I wish to kidnap Kimberly, the Best Yoga Instructor EVER.

Oh, Kimberly. You, a mother of four who can nevertheless stand on one foot while holding the other foot to the ceiling. You, who can discuss "root lock" and "sitz bones" without making me snort like a seventh grader. You somehow cause me to focus on my breathing and my practice instead of the state of my eyebrows or the cute outfit of my neighbor.

When I do Warrior Three, which involves balancing on one leg while holding my arms aloft, your murmur of "Beautiful," makes me feel like I'm soaring. When you remind us to practice "Santi," (meaning truth) in our practice it inspires me to live more honestly, both on and off the mat.

During your class, I find myself thinking of the strength of womanhood. When we do poses called "Goddess Pose," or "Moon Warrior," I honor my body, thinking of the strength it took for me to bear two children. I don't usually think this way, because it's a little hippy-dippy, but when I'm holding a pose and challenging my limitations, I allow myself this indulgance.

In final relaxation, you places soft, scented towels over our eyelids and gently press our shoulders down, releasing any remaining tension. I'm struck by how little I am touched during the day, and the power of said touch. The boys touch, but it is a taking, needy touch. You gives with kindness.

I leave yoga feeling taller, calmer, and more pleased with my body.

I also leave with nefarious plans to kidnap you, my yoga instructor, so I can summon you to teach me at my bidding.

What can I say? I'm not a true yogi yet.