Fashion Emergency

Dear Carters, Gymboree, and the rest of Y'all: 

My husband used to be a Korean translator, so he traveled to Asia fairly often in his younger days.

He's been to Japan at least twice, and has always been amazed and...stunned by the creative applications of the English language.

Don't get me wrong. If I was writing anything in Japanese, it would be a disaster. Big ups to the Japanese for even making the effort. Nevertheless, the mangled results are often funny, or just plain weird.

This is typical.

As is this.

Paul reports that it wouldn't be unusual to see a large billboard saying something like, "Elephant Fuck." No further explanation given, or apparently needed.

I thought of this today as Joel and I enjoyed a refreshing beverage together:

My mother bought him this shirt, and I find it quite dashing indeed. But also confusing. Don't alligators eat squirrels and people and fish? I imagine they would eschew kale or brussel sprouts with a swift barrel roll and a bite to the jugular.

Maybe I'm over-thinking this.

I'm not opposed to dressing children in silly outfits for my own amusement:

Owen's shirt says, "Hi, I'm new here."  Joel is dressed as a giraffe. And LOVING it.

Although I personally wouldn't do it, I can see the humor in shirts like this. Because I'm secretly a twelve-year-old boy:

Also, I'm all about newborn clothing that says, "I love Mommy." After all, when the little beastie projectile vomits unspeakable things at three AM, it's good to have a reminder.

I just ask, clothing designers, for a bit of logic.  I mean, I just don't get how "Good Boy" and a stegosaurus go together.

And while you're at it? You can stop taunting mothers who have only boys with things like this:

Love,

Me