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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Knuckleheads

I was at a playgroup this morning. My friend watched my two-year-old repeatably attempt to scale  a couch, in efforts to climb upon a counter-top, and perhaps swing, Tarzan-style from the ceiling fan.

She shook her head, and observed, "You know, Nance---your husband is such a mellow guy. I'm really surprised that at least one of your boys isn't like him."

I rolled my eyes, pulled Joel away from the fireplace poker, and replied, "You and me both, sister."

My husband, whose legendary cool makes Barack Obama look like Macho Man Randy Savage, apparently kept all the Chillaxing Genes to himself. My two knuckleheads, as I now call them, believe that life is better as a Mountain Dew commercial minus pesky details like helmets or common sense.

I thought about her comment all day today. I thought about it during preschool pickup, as Joel rode a couch like the late Dennis Hopper in Easy Rider.

I thought about it on the drive home, when I noticed he was missing his glasses. I asked, "Where are your glasses, Joely?" prepared for another rousing game of Find The Eyewear.

"I don't know," he replied. Then, after a few moments, he found them. There were on his forehead, hidden by his mop of frat-boy-after-a-great-night hair.


Don't even get me started on his older brother.  The shenanigans with the Little Tykes car alone causes me to reach for the whiskey.

After pickup, I had to take the knuckleheads to the special store to pick up the super-special pizza dough and olive oil. As we perused the wine aisle, I heard Smashmouth's "Rock Star," playing over the intercom.

"I LOVE this song!" I squeed, and started dancing in the aisle. Hands in the air, like I just don't care and all of that. Owen joined me, doing his patented bend-and-creep-with-devil horns dance move. Joel sat in the cart, shaking his head back and forth.

So where do these boys get it from? Oh....right....me.

***
Speaking of my younger knucklehead...there were four amazing entries in the Pontify My Son Contest:

Salt:




The Blogging Goddess:



dek:



My Life in Purple:

All were beyond amazing. Truly. The mind, it is boggled. However, I consulted my team of experts and it was determined to be a two-way tie between...The Blogging Goddess (those shoes!!!) and Salt (the throne!!!).

Salt gets the Eddie Murray bobblehead and The Blogging Goddess and I will negotiate something cool for her prize.

Thank you, everybody for your indulgence. (Get it? Indulgence? Reformation humor! The best!)

32 comments:

My Life in Purple said...

It's just an honour to be nominated :P

I have a cousin-in-law, coincidentally named Joel, that I believe could rival your husband in a Jack Johnson style Mellow-Off.

H ave you seen 'the mellow show' skit from SNL?
http://www.mefeedia.com/tv/25904127

Muliebrity said...

You do have a mellow husband. I sure hope he is a little more lively in the bedroom. Actually, I don't think I want to know. Also, I'm uncomfortable mentioning your bedroom like on a post where your childed looks like the Pope. It seems wrong, yet I'm doing it anyway. Hmmm...

Matty said...

Funny, I've had this conversation with people many times. How two or three children from the same set of parents can be so different, and/or different from their parents. As a child, my son was definitely a knucklehead. I was sure he would be one as a adult. And that's interesting too, because as a married man and father he's just the opposite. Mature and responsible.

There is hope for your boys. LOL

Maude Lynn said...

I have no Pope pictures of my child. What kind of mother am I?

adrienzgirl said...

I was just telling my girlfriends this morning that Kamden has this annoying habit lately. He is rambling off random facts he reads, all. the. time. He never stops. I told my husband it was driving me insane. My husband just looked at me and aloofly says "Imagine a world where there are two of you."

Oh...right, he is a mini version of me.

Dang!

BTW, that picture from Salt? EPIC!

Anonymous said...

The TO is a Mr. Mellow and my boys are WILD. I blame the mailman.

The Blogging Goddess said...

ME!!! I am so honored!! Thank you!! My son is a friggin maniac. And my daughter is mellow, except for when she HAS to sit still. They are the wiggle worms and the only time they focus is when the TV is on. I think they got it from the puppy...and not in a perverted way or anything, in a learned way.

Furry Bottoms said...

I love the way you described dancing down the aisle with hands in the air as if you didn't care... more people need to be like you because it will bring smiles all around!

Macey said...

I would love to see someone dancing because they like the song at the store instead of just being drunk.

Cheeseboy said...

You sound like a cool person that would be fun to hang out with.

For the record though, I hate that Rock Star song.

Cheryl said...

Yes, who, indeed? Also? Chillax is one of my fave words. I think it is also my kids' least favorite word..

Formerly known as Frau said...

I love it the apple doesn't fall far! I can totally see you dancing in the aisle!

Anonymous said...

Ha! Love the pics! (So cute!!) And love that you were rockin it in the aisle. You are awesome!

shortmama said...

I wish my girls were more like me!! My hubs is the one with zero patience and loud (not just a yeller when irritated but talks loud in general), likes to pester..and my girls act exactly the same!

I am the chill relaxed goofy one...ok Im bossy and they are too..they got my ONE bad trait, imagine that

Coby said...

You know, we thought we had a mellow one in Peanut. Then he became mobile, and now he's just a feisty little guy. The twins...well, forget it. The only time they're mellow is when they're asleep. Maybe I'll just keep having babies until I get a mellow one.

Lothiriel said...

LOL
I was told our baby was gonna be mellow because daddy and are very laid back people. She's not even one yet and figured out how to get inside the entertainment center!! I was blogg...err...cleaning. I took my eyes off her for a few seconds and she was gone!!

Joey Lynn Resciniti said...

That devil horn dance sounds adorable!

June said...

Knucklehead...that is term of endearment for Pinkus many a days.

The pictures are awesome! I wish I was better at photoshop.

Jenny said...

Love this post. Loved your descriptions of your shopping trip. I think it's great your kids are learning exuberance from you.

And the pope pictures...wow...hilarious on so many levels.

TKW said...

Our first-born, we are convinced, is from Mars. She's not like either of us. I love the mental image of you dancing in the store!

An Imperfect Momma said...

The devil horn dance? Too adorable! Love how you were dancing in the store with them...I have done the same with monkey man. You are just awesome lady! :)

Liz Mays said...

I love that you gave him some spunk and personality! Nothing wrong with a little spitfire dude, especially the pontificating kind.

Salt said...

I WON!? OMG!!!! And would you believe that an Eddie Murray bobble head would be highly appreciated in my home? He is one of my favorite ballplayers of all time. :) Thank you!!

If you would like a larger version of that picture to frame and hang on your wall, let me know.

My husband sounds like your husband. You sound like me. I wonder which one of us our future kid will be like??

Ash said...

See, I thought your knuckleheads were going to lead to wine spilling in the aisle.

Dancers and climbers - sound just about perfect to me :-)

Bekah said...

Dance away! Perfectly legal way of staying sane in the grocery store. And I love Salt's pic- is he Levitating??

Tina L. Hook said...

Kudos to your talented readers for those pope photos! The Hubs and I will be using this strategy for our xmas cards this year.

Michelle Pixie said...

I am cracking up over those Pope pictures! Have you framed them and hung them in the house yet? Hee Hee

Dang! Your knuckleheads are so freaking cute!!

Anita said...

As I was sitting in my car waiting for my youngest daughter to finish a class, there was a boy walking up and down the sidewalk in front of where I was parked, in the rain, waving something repeatedly over his head.
I stared and thought about all that testosterone, or whatever. I think God knew what he was doing when he gave me all girls...or did He, cause that's another story. :)

Since they got it from you, you can hande it!

Fun post to read. :)

Kristy @Loveandblasphemy said...

OH so funny. My hub is so mellow too, and his grandpas were wonderful men. However, the males on my side of the family are known to be really obnoxious! My boy is such a maniac. I hope it is toddler boy phase and that more of my husband's side of the family will show through as he gets older!!!! :)

Unknown said...

I'll trade you a drama queen for one of your knuckleheads???

;-)
loved all the entries, they were all SO FUN!

Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

Loving the papal pics of your son!!! They are way cute. And yes, just when I am blaming my children for being XYZ, I realize that they get all their *best* qualities from me.

Marla said...

Holy Joely!! Too funny! BTW...we have lovingly refered to our kids as The Knuckleheads for over 30 years now. Great minds, Nancy!