No Country For Non-Seasonal Peeps

Dear JustBorn, creators of Marshmallow Peeps: 

I have specific, non-negotiable rules about seasonal candy. For example, Valentine's hearts are only good in February. Likewise, candy corn is strictly for Halloween. And, most importantly, Marshmallow Peeps are strictly for Easter. Or Passover, for my Jewish friends.

There has been a disturbing trend to package Peeps for other holidays. Marshmallow Ghosts. Marshmallow Christmas Trees. Patriotic Peeps. I have even seen Valentine's Day Peeps. Contemptible.

This is a miscarriage of all things good and holy regarding your fine confection. This abomination ends today.

As a child, I would go outside with my pink plastic Easter basket and collect the eggs. Although I enjoyed the jelly beans and the peanut-butter eggs, I cherished the yellow Peeps most of all. The rest of my family did not share my love, calling your delectable marshmallow and sugar goodness "gross" or "too sweet."

Their loss. My method of consumption was tried and true. I would leave the Peeps out for a day or two until they achieved the perfect, slightly stale consistency I craved. I would begin with the butt, and nibble my way to the perk little beak. Bliss.

The last bite was bittersweet, (at least as bitter as a marshmallow covered in sugar can be), for I knew I would need to wait an entire year until my next Peep. And so, I learned patience. I learned of the fleeting nature of small joys. I learned to savor good things.

And yet, in search of  Almighty Profits, the next generation will not learn these lessons. Immediate gratification! Peeps for the sake of peeps! Good God, JustBorn, do you wish to leave such a painful legacy?

Save the future. Save yourself. Make Peeps a seasonal treat. Limit yourself to yellow bunnies and pink rabbits.

It's the right thing to do.

 Make it Work!

Avoid the bloodbath. 

Save us all. 

Sincerly,

Nancy


Thanks to adrienzgirl for indulging such foolishness